Sure, I can totally understand how some Wal-Mart shoppers can sometimes feel rather annoyed while trying to navigate their shopping carts through those big, spacious (and in my opinion, mostly wonderful) stores - especially during the holiday season - but believe me, if you tend to feel "road rage" in big box department stores in America, then trying to go just about ANYWHERE in Asia on a daily basis will probably drive you to the nut house in the blink of an eye.
"Lack of personal space" is usually the number one cited annoyance for tourists and expats just trying to make sense of daily life in most countries in East Asia. Sadly, there is not only no sense of personal space, there don't seem to be any clear protocols about which side of the sidewalk people should walk on in most Asian countries. Even worse, people stand in and block doorways, and will just linger there, engaging in an extremely loud public greeting with someone else. Sometimes, even full fledged conversations will be carried on for long periods of time in the middle of a public doorway.
As if that weren't enough, people in the region tend to rush into elevators before people trying to alight can even begin to get out. Or they come to a sudden halt and stand and stare like a deer caught in headlights for long, long periods of time at the bottom and top of escalators. Even more infuriating, groups of friends or even entire families will walk side by side down sidewalks, leaving no room whatsoever for anyone else to pass. Oh sure, you can step down on the street momentarily to get around (which I had to do more times than I care to remember in Taiwan), but believe me, with the way Chinese traffic tends to be, you really don't want to take the very real chance that you might get struck by an oncoming motor vehicle.
The concept of queueing up seems particularly alien to the Chinese in particular, who will very quickly cut in front of you, unless you are practically close enough to lick the back of the head of the person in front of you while waiting in line at McDonald's, a bank or wherever. And when subway doors open, it's every man for himself. Pushing, shoving, you name it. Is this what the "5000 years of civilization" that they're always bragging about has brought the Chinese people?
And don't even get me started on THE TANKS. Well, they're actually baby strollers (often carrying kids that are much too old to still be pathetically squeezed into the seat), but people in China, Taiwan and Korea tend to use them as a way to guilt or even physically FORCE pedestrians to get out of their way. So naturally, behind the wheel of a motor vehicle, quite a few Asians are the very definition of HELL ON WHEELS.
But you're supposed to PRETEND that none of these things are happening! No matter how rude, obnoxious and just plain FOUL people may be behaving in public, you are supposed to just take it up the backside. Day in and day out people endure these reckless, congested and uncouth conditions in Asia, to the point where many people seem to become profoundly passive aggressive. As a result, all this pent up angst tends to cause people to behave in very odd ways sometimes.
I've had people deliberately slam right into me in Taiwan, while pretending that they didn't see me at all. This happened so often in Taiwan, that I finally started to take my keys out of my pocket and firmly lodge the biggest one between the fingers of my tightly clenched fist and hold it out down at my side, so that, if anyone should happen to "accidentally" slam into me, they would not get away unscathed. A good strong umbrella at your side also works wonders. Umbrella or keys, after I started wielding subtle weapons like this, no Chinese ever managed to "accidentally" slam into me again.
Make no mistake about it. Asia can be an incredibly infuriating, uncomfortable and just plain frustrating place to try to simply exist. I long for the day when I can simply go back to the small town existence I once knew as boy in Southwest Missouri, where people tend to nod and say "hello," whether they know you or not. I'm very happy to have a Korean wife, but believe me, Asia ain't no picnic. And it certainly ain't no Shangrila. Not by a long shot.
So before you decide to head East, young man (or woman), be forewarned. Your home country may not be perfect, but East Asia is much, much less perfect that you may want to have to someday be forced to deal with. There are no more Samurai or Ninjas running around over here anymore, and much of what Asians advertise is simply little more than face saving pretense. And that's just the cold, hard truth of the matter, I'm afraid.
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